Don on Lane 15

Wal-Mart attracts three types of customers at any given time. I fluctuate between customer types (almost as easily as my weight fluctuates) depending on my reason for visiting Wal-Mart. I suspect this is true for most people who visit the everything-you-need-under-one-roof (except a soldering iron) supercenter-retail-giant.

Customer Type One

Loner

With nothing better to do on a Saturday night at 9:35 PM, this customer resorts to the brightly lit aisles, crisply folded shirts and wide expanse of orthopedic shoes (worn by a majority of customers, possibly even this customer) for a quick pick-me-up. They are extremely tempted to purchase something, thinking of it as a Mount Rushmore thimble to add to their thimble collection. Their life is that sad. And, what a better chance to show off the new $15 hair cut on rollback at the hair salon that is actually inside the Supercenter! Props to Laquisha for making the world look better, one Wal-Mart hair cut at a time.

Customer Type Two

Shopping-List-in-Hand-Coupon-Crazy-(Wo)man

This (Wo)man has scheduled 30 minutes in his/her day to fill that trademark blue cart to the rim with Great Value products. Grocery list organized by aisle, this shopper wastes no time. He/she knows best to ignore the toy aisles for fear of fit-throwing toddlers in the middle of the aisle. For these tots are the culprits of making this shopping trip five minutes longer then it needs to be. Shame on them! They also ignore the cheese aisle. People always stand way too long, debating between fancy shredded cheddar or finely shredded cheddar (they’re the same thing). And while waiting to check out, he/she moans and grumbles about the long wait only to be the one who tries to bribe the cashier into using expired coupons. Angry and insulted when the cashier says no, the customer usually bags their own items, refuses eye contact with the cashier and moves out the doors in a hustle. The cashier always seems to breathe a sigh of relief after these guests exit. Only to welcome another customer just like the one before, waiting impatiently with car keys in hand.

Customer Type Three

These people think to themselves...“If only Gucci ran Wal-Mart”

These people think they are too good for Wal-Mart. In fact, they think they are too good for the world. They’re the ones who post pictures of us other folk on PeopleofWal-Mart.com wearing our pajamas to pick up NyQuil. They’re the ones so ashamed of being within a five mile radius of the-place-that-shall –not-be-named that they wear Armani bug eye sunglasses and a Prada baseball cap as a disguise. Wal-Mart is strictly a place to buy things they can’t buy at Nordstrom or Barneys. Things like toothpaste and band-aids. Their goal is to go in, be undetected, and get out. Similar to customer two, they also ignore common courtesy while rolling through the check out. (I have never been this customer type; I’d prefer a shopping spree at Wal-Mart any day over a sweep of Rodeo Drive.)

Considering these customer types this evening after I strolled through the store as customer type one, I came to a conclusion.

Old men named Don should not be working at Wal-Mart.

Don has a hunched back from years of picking up and swinging giggling grandchildren over his head until his spine couldn’t take the pressure. His movements are considerate, to preserve his mobility. His joints know that one quick movement or awkward twist may consign him to a wheel chair. Never missing eye contact, Don understands deeply the potential of a neighborly smile.

Don should be at home with his loving wife. If she is still living. He should be sneaking candy to his grandkids before dinner. If he has any grandkids. The folds of sagging skin under his hopeful eyes should be watching another grandchild born, a baby tooth lost and training wheels being taken off.

It is not time in life for Don to be dealing change back to stuffy, self-concerned customers. Don is beyond the hustle and bustle of life. He deserves to be.

One look at his face and feel of his soft hands as he handed me back my change tonight, and I couldn’t help but want to know more about this amicable man. After making eye contact, I could see the vague outline of a file cabinet in his eyes, containing every lesson learned, heartache, frustration and triumph experienced by this man. I am amazed I was able to feel this compassion within a matter of seconds. My curiosity was peaked as I contemplated what conditions have placed this sweet man working lane 15 at Wal-Mart. What bills are going unpaid or stock has plummeted that have taken Don away from his retirement? I regretted the angry, impatient people Don must encounter as he adjusts his glasses so he can see the keys on the register through his bifocals. I felt I must apologize for the rudeness of the person before me, who exhibited customer two type behaviors; far too often, I fall in this category. I wanted to ask him how much longer his shift was and if he was going to be able to enjoy a relaxing weekend. I just wanted him to know that I was not a heartless creature, and that I had a genuine interest in him enjoying the rest of his evening. I would have talked to that man if time had allowed. But behind me, was customer type two, credit card in hand, her 30 minutes up.